"We're going to have a nice long talk over dinner, and then you're coming back to my house to see Uryuu-kun. Feel free to sob into my welcoming bosom any time you like."
"I think I'd rather die."
He wasn’t sure if he ought to have been more disturbed by the fact that Isshin was so openly accepting of the relationship between their two sons, or that he'd just compared them both to wild horses.
Ichigo's legs almost gave out on him and he had to grab the door handle for support. "But you wouldn't... I mean... you didn't... do *stuff*... did you?"
Isshin grinned wolfishly. "Are you implying that there was a night of frantic passion in which your daddy and Uryuu-kun's daddy made wild monkey love to each other?"
Ichigo looked disgusted. "On second thought, don't answer. I wouldn't want to lose what little breakfast I've eaten this morning."
"Kurosaki, are you there? Yuzu-chan said that you were taking too long, so she sent me up to get you and..." Ishida trailed off when he peered around the door, and his face darkened considerably when he caught sight of Ryuuken. "What's going on? What is *he* doing here?"
"He's my new special friend!" Isshin replied cheerfully. "We may or may not have slept together last night, but we *did* steal a very expensive-looking crystal swan. You can have it if you like."
Ichigo reached over and jerked Rukia’s hands out of his grip, twapping their heads angrily. Chad glanced back, his face unreadable. Ichigo…he thought to himself. If he and Rukia had a kid…he began to form a child’s face. Maybe a girl? He set Rukia’s hair on the child’s head. Took after her father…
He coloured her hair orange, and…put…Ichigo’s…features….
He blanched visibly, and hunched his back, sweatdrops making his head heavy. Ichigo turned to him, an eyebrow raised and a frown in place. “The hell are YOU thinking?”
Mizuiro shook his head vigorously. “No, no! It’s just…” He glanced around. “Every guy of our genre does it sometime or another. Shouldn’t we…” He threw up his arms. “I don’t know. Try our best to break out of the stereotypical image that so many shounen characters have been placed under that it has become the rule, no, I’d even say that for guys like us to spy on our friends in a Hot Spring has become a programmed decis—”
“Tatsuki-san. Kuchiki-san. Inoue-san.” Keigo said, placing stressing each as he listed them down.
Mizuiro shrugged. “Momentary lapse of sanity.”
Ishida growled. “You didn’t even hear what I was going to say!”
“No. Any plan that starts with that screwball’s name is bound to be crap.” Ichigo snorted.
“…This is exactly what you always do. You just want to run in and hack stuff up with your—”
“What the hell! It’s better than your pansy ass style of running off to get a better shot!”
Ishida snarled. A Quincy’s fighting style is not to be mocked. “Oh, okay, since you mentioned it, I bet I could put five arrows through your stomach before you even had a chance to—”
Chad sighed. He didn’t even get half of what they were saying.
Hey, Ichi-nii, this is Karin. Visited last night, cause Dad wanted to. You weren’t there, so he assumed you eloped for real. I suggest you visit him tonight so the idiot can stop making preparations for a ‘real’ ceremony.
“Like…the curtains! I haven’t washed the curtains and—”
Karin rolled her eyes. “I doubt Kuchiki-san will criticize you over curtains you washed last week.”
“—And then the laundry isn’t done—”
“You’re being silly. Why would Kuchiki-san care about our laundry?”
“—And Daddy is trying to cook dessert!”
“…Okay. Now you’ve given me a compelling reason to get off this couch.”
Ichigo stared at him oddly. “I think that maybe, just maybe, you’re insane.”
“Insane? On the contrary, I’m perfectly right. If you truly desire something, with perseverance and the power of love, YOU CAN PREVAIL!”
Ichigo pinched the bridge of his nose, a headache coming fast. “…How can ANYONE say that with a straight face?”
Isshin continued, oblivious to his son’s aggravation, slamming one foot onto a stool in the classic ‘I proclaim’ pose. “Yes. YES! WITH THE POWER OF LOVE!”